Restless, thy name is marieke today. Add a day of rain to a government shutdown, and you have the perfect recipe for cabin fever.
The first half of the day was spent on one attempt after another to create a shutdown song, but I just could not find the angle. I even tried replacing the uke for a guitar. After a half an hour on the guitar—which seemed even larger than I ever remembered—I wound up with a deeper, more powerful sound and numbness in my right arm.
Finally, toward the late afternoon, my sweetie and I left the couch for a walk in a misty wood. I was grouchy. None of my photos were coming out as I wanted them to, my scarf was itching my neck, and I felt combative and unsettled.
What was wrong with me?
This time of year, I always feel restless, and being out of work has inspired deeper thought about what I am doing with my life, where it is going, and if I am happy.
I do not regularly consider my emotional state. I just keep plugging away.
Write.
Compose a song.
Create something.
Anything.
Just keep going.
By the end of the walk, I felt better. Going outside and getting out of my head is a good practice. a reminder that I am just one being dancing in a larger universe whose complexity I cannot begin to imagine.
Thank you for:
The rain.
The trees watching over me.
The vibrant colors, made even more vivid by the rain.
A beaver, swimming back and forth through clear water.
My love for his patience.
A wise universe.